Grief

16 Jul 2024

Dream

An insight into my dreams I had . Never had a choice to leave school, it wasn’t an option. I had to return and be in close quarters with threats (bullies) they bullied me in person and online which probably felt like I couldn’t escape feeling unsafe (tigers, lions outside) because I still had threats coming in via phone. My abusive marriage has a similar theme— irrationally felt that I had no choice but to stay- feel stuck- even though there are periods of intermittent positive reinforcement. I believe that I truly will never be able to let him go and not be in love with him for the rest of my life. These two variables cross into a distorted dream version of my reality. I am always trying to collect my things and escape but I can never retrieve all of my belongings (heavy grief is associated with the feeling of leaving important items behind) and even when I do get out to a vehicle with my stuff I can’t carry it and the car never works/comes to get me.

12 Jul 2024

Dream

I was in third person, but following the story of Deadpool, but as if Deadpool was also me? I was looking into my first lair, and then I bought my first box full of cans of this alcohol lemonade? Or spiked soda. Then I was helping out with a daughter and her packing meals to deliver to her school. I completed that. I called Peter Parker, and was going to ask him for a favor, when he says he was going to ask the same. Peter’s girlfriend is giving him hell, and he needs somewhere safe for him and his mother to live. And I said, “tell you what, I won’t kill your girlfriend, I’ll offer you my house as sanctuary. You deliver these meals to my daughter’s school. Deal?” We agree, explore the city, falling but catching myself unharmed picking up more alcohol and Peter and his mom. There’s at some point a dramatic shift in days, ballpark, and such. We find out Peter’s mother is dead…and Peter is grieving. I am (as Deadpool) aching for his pain, but I will grab a can of alcohol…and head out to fight who killed Peter’s mom. On a mission, enraged.

19 Apr 2024

Dream

Dreamt that I was with a group of family and friends. There was a brother and sister who were really close. We were going shopping and navigating through a rocky desert. Most of us were in one large group, but the sister had gone off with her father to another part of the desert. There was an explosion, and we saw a plume of dust. Then a head with long, curly red hair fell out of the sky onto the rocks. My dad and I were quick to try to surround and obscure the head so the brother wouldn't see, but he'd seen enough. He was decasted that his sister was dead -- they were incredibly close.

25 Mar 2024

Dream

Two lions were walking through the vast desert, there was a silence between the two, until one dropped dead and the other sat there and sobbed, then it was wolves, and deers, but it was all the same, one died, leaving the other to cry and greive their lose, the world became small in the span of three days, and through the next week everything started to break down, nothing could be fixed, the human existance was nothing but mere history, an omnipotent darkness fell over Earth, the sounds of howling from greif echoed through the air as a strong wind swooped through the Earth, the trees swayed and the leaves fell, the green blades of grass turned burnt and brown, nothing was left.

23 Mar 2024

Dream

My husband is worried I'm going to leave because family took something out of context of what I said. I had a dream that I left because of the drama and him not doing the work o stay sober and doing the work to come home. I want to help but not let it be all on me. My kids are iffy on wanting dad home. I felt like in my dream I was a terrible mother and that I should leave but I felt so much grief and loss and felt like I made the wrong mistake.

25 Feb 2024

Dream

A water park/aquarium awarded my family free tickets. Me, my daughter, my two sons and their father. We had fun viewing the exhibits and learning about their research on on ocean life. The main attraction was a new species of killer whale raised in captivity and experimented on to allow it to eat trash in the oceans and reduce pollution and oceanic waste. We were all so captivated by the discovery and their exhibition that we didn’t notice my youngest son slip away. He somehow had gotten into the whale tank and was swimming and splashing. The handlers and whale also noticed at the same moment. We all tried to get to him but the whale was faster and I watched in horror as my son was eaten. I fell to my knees in horror, grief and shock and began to cry. His father came to me and after a moment shrugged and said “welp. So what are we gonna eat tonight?” I stared at him in disbelief as I continued to cry.

6 Feb 2024

Dream

I had a dream where me and some YouTubers, some I knew and some not, and we were in a game like The Long Dark but modified. We we descending a warehouse and taking turns distracting a wolf while we looked for supplies. At some point it was only me and one other dude and I was briefly alone in a neighborhood above ground with a female friend. When we went into a house she was killed by a ghost similar to Phasmophobia and I saw 4 POVs of her death, 2 from each of us. After that I had a dream that my dad returned this rubber/resin figurine of his dog to Target to get a new one, and also got two puppies and some dog supplies while we were there. Target let us watch ads to get a dog house. My dad didn’t want to spend too much money on supplies because his mom kept using his money and not paying him back. We ended up getting a few supplies most notably dog treats that helped dogs get over grief. He was also a small streamer in my dream. I remember more but these were the most important moments.

22 Jan 2024

Dream

My dad.. he died almost 2 years ago VERY unexpectedly. In these various different dreams he appears in, the scenarios are always different, but never negative. I miss him every second of every day.. & these dreams do nothing but cause me more anger & sorrow & grief & to miss him more when I wake up.