Mother

18 Jul 2024

Dream

I had a few separate dreams, the first one I was chilling out with an old high school friend her name is Nayana. We were in my apartment late at night, and she said she’s about to go to work which I was a bit surprised as it’s late then she said they have come late sometimes and night shifts that she doesn’t have much control of, I asked what’s her job to which she said is a stripper. I didn’t judge her for it but I realize she has lots of nice clothes and stuff so it makes sense, I couldn’t help but to still admire her and aspire being gorgeous just like her. In another dream, I was home using the bathroom to where I heard a knock and my mother’s ex fiancée was there asking if I wanted anything from the grocery store as they were going grocery shopping that day, I was feeling not so happy because it’s been over a year since he’s moved out, me and my mom both seen his true colors and immaturity so seeing him back here was triggering especially because he used to unintentionally do stuff that annoys me. I was with a group of people in front my apartment building, and were trying to fit in the car so someone came up with the idea to let smaller people in first and I’m pretty small but he said not enough apparently. I said that I’m only 115 lbs, I kinda started flexing by saying model agency who are looking for skinny models would consider me. It was probably cold that day since we’re dressed warm, plus it was cloudy and rainy a bit.

18 Jul 2024

Dream

I am at a school. There is a male figure selling drugs to students. I am tempted and bought some. I am walking all over the campus trying to find a bathroom stall to use. The entire time I am walking around I am hiding the pipe in my pocket so no one would noticed. Every few moments I would notice the tip of the pipe is poking out my pocket and my hands isn’t in my pocket to cover it. I would panic and hide it again with my hands. Every bathroom I go to is either full or doesn’t have a stall. I tried to enter a female bathroom but there was females in every one of them. I finally found one but the walls was glass. I see people walking by but no one notice me in there. I take the pipe out my pocket but instead of using I end up destroying it and flushing it down the toilet. At some point, in the search for a bathroom, I am searching for a car. I see a teacher and a student in the parking lot talking. I know who they are. I had this feeling the teacher would be in trouble for doing that as it seemed like fraternization. I walked away. I am in the principle office. The female figure principle notice the teacher and the student through a window. I told the principle the student was struggle with school work and the teacher is trying to help the student. The principle seem to accept my response. Another incident happened while looking for privacy in the bathroom. As I am search for an empty bathroom, a male figure teacher approach me. The conversation seem very flirtatious. The male figure teacher was smiling and touching me in a way that felt obvious he wanted me. I was attracted to him, too. After our conversation we went out separate ways. I am walking around but the scene is no longer a school or it was still the school but had a building with many doors. When I walked in there was a stage and what seemed like a theater. Lots of people were everywhere. I am sitting down listening to someone on stage. I felt a know the person speaking. The female figure was talking about someone as if they are sharing a meaningful memory they have. I hear a female figure who felt like my mom making a negative comment about the length of the speech and people laughing. Another female figure is now on stage sharing her memory of the person. It didn’t fell like a funeral. The energy was joyful and happiness. Throughout the dream certain decisions I made set the scene red or blue. I know why it changed between the two colors because before bed I did a guided meditation with blue sodalite crystal. During the meditation the guide said red was for emotional response and blue was logical response. I felt I integrated the mediation into my dream. In another dream I am setting next to what felt like a male figure. He was an angel. I looked to my right where he is sitting and asked if he want me to bring him to earth or stay where he is. I also was sexually attracted to him and felt myself wanting to make a move. I woke up before I received an answer.

18 Jul 2024

Dream

I dreamed that my mother turned into a kitty cat, and she was meowing, and it turned into English, and it was like, why did you leave me like that? I am your only mother kitty. I'm not giving any attention to all those other kitty cats, even those mean, some of those mean Spanish kitty cats. So, I turned into a kitty cat as well, and then we went to some kind of Trump rally, and the Donald Trump kitty cat was injured, and he started crying real bad. He was like, meow, meow, meow, and then all of a sudden the, what is it, the BLM guy was telling me I should move in, and go back to FedEx ground.

17 Jul 2024

Dream

Me and my mom were arguing about everything

17 Jul 2024

Dream

With an ex girlfriend at a diner for breakfast. I remember walking in and going to the checkin and speaking to one of the waitresses that took our name. We had to wait for a while. We we walked into the restaurant where the people were enjoying their meals. I saw a bench and sat down just before the table next to the bench was done eating and they got up and one of the guys went to sit on the other side of the bench. It was small so there was no room for his girlfriend. She walked up almost expecting me to get up so she could sit with her boyfriend but I didn't because they were done eating so I was still waiting for table so I'm like, they should be leaving so I'm not getting up. She was annoyed but never directed it to me even though it was obvious. She was tan like maybe she was mixed with Indian and Hispanic or something and he was white with brown messy curly hair and a short beard. I got up because it looked like my ex (girlfriend at the time) got a table and was sitting down. I went over there. The table was round or square. I sat walked up and she was sitting with some older lady. I sat and she had already ordered us food and we started eating. We were eating some cereal and I was like, where is the real food? She said she ordered the same thing for me as she had another plate of warm food that was covered in aluminum foil for some reason but I don't know what it was and I didn't have that dish even though she had hers. Suddenly, I realized the once crowded restaurant was almost empty and was much smaller than before. Lots of staff came in and now it looked like they were wearing hospital clothing. They went up to the guy from before with the girlfriend and the bench and were going to hold him down and give him a shot. His girlfriend was no longer there. He looked at me and said something in hopes I'd defend him and they all looked at me and I said I don't know what the heck was going on. Suddenly, I realized they were never talking to this other guy and that they were here for me the whole time. The waitress from the front counter was holding a needle and was right next to me. Next thing I know I was with her but we were outside in a side yard spa e with a white wall and brown wooden fence. She had a huge brownish red pit bull mastiff or something. It had beady eyes compared to its massive head and it was on a leash but lunging for me. She was going to let him go and the dog would have attacked me but then I was at my mom's house walking around and went into the kitchen. Where there were 3 golden retrievers that were friendly. I started petting one and then saw a series of scenes like I was watching a movie trailer for a horror film. The film was about my experience at the diner and th last scene was the waitress who now looked like some dead demon lady with paper white skin and long black hair crawling up to my ex girlfriend who was sitting on the ground of the diner sliding back as to get away and my ex girlfriends face exploded and this demon waitresses face melted off and and onto my exs face like it was making room to replace her head with this new one. I then thought that this was too scary to watch right before bed and turned off the TV. I then realized I was watching this on a TV as the scene panned back showing the television. I was in my bed and I then got up to go to the bathroom like I normally would which made it feel super real. I think that's when I woke up but I can't remember any more details.

17 Jul 2024

Dream

I had a dream that I had a son. My mom was driving me back from the hospital. We got into the driveway of the house, ig I was living back at home, and I was kind of excited. As we're getting out the car some neighbors came to greet us and see the new baby. I was kind of uneasy because I was trying to smile through the fact that my boyfriend was no where to be found. Where is you boyfriend my mom asked and my neighbors waited for a response. I wanted to cry and scream but I simply said, "I'm not sure. I think he's coming soon. " I started to get my son out the back seat as I was fully recognizing that I was someones mother. I knew it. I knew I would have a son first for some reason. As I started to unbuckle him from the car seat, he started to slip though it. The car seat started to fall apart. Oh wow. My neighbor said. That is not a great car seat. I snapped, I know, I had to use my baby doll car seat because I have no place to put him. I picked him up and held him in my arms. I thought about how tiny he was but that would only last a few days. I needed a bigger car seat. I started to think about the face that I'm responsible for this human being for the rest of my life. I continued to hold him and looked up at my mother. Her eyes were full of pity. Tears began to swell in my eyes. I shouted, I didn't even want a child and now he left me alone with a son! I began to really feel the pain of being left alone. I went inside with my son. As I was walking I was thinking of all my options to get him a car seat. I figured I would ask my dad to buy me a all in one stroller/car seat for my birthday instead of the gift he was giving me. I started planning a baby shower in my head and taking a mental note of everything I wanted on my Amazon shopping list. I laid him on the bed and began to cry again, almost in denial that I was really alone with this child.

17 Jul 2024

Dream

My mother kicked me out of the house to live in the garage and on the front porch after an argument about clothes my sister gave me. She did not like my attitude. I was acting like a spoiled brat and was unrepentant of my attitude toward my sister and parents. I dug in an ashtray to collect coins and cash.

16 Jul 2024

Dream

I was in a theatre production. I'd been cast as The mother of one of the main characters. She had few lines, nut I somehow convinced the producer to let me sing. I did the costume change, got stuck in the bathroom because of IBS, and then came back on stage. The "potion" I had to drink almost made me sick, then I started my song. One of the three muse-like characters gave me her mic/transmitter. Part of the mic got shoved into my mouth on accident.

15 Jul 2024

Dream

I had the strangest dream. First I was at home with my boyfriend but we were sharing the apartment, my apartment which I bought, with three people, two boys and a girl. They used to live with my boyfriend like they were his flatmate, flatmates, and then all of a sudden they ended up living with me and at first I was fine with it and it was a mess. They would eat our food in the fridge but my boyfriend was like okay with it, always smiling and I was complaining and I didn't feel listened to. He wasn't listening to me, taking into account my feelings. And then I remember there was a problem. I was at my partner's mother's place and we had some kind of problem. I had to go to work in the evening because I was doing the night shift and I was so worried because I had to go to work. But, I don't know, there was this problem with the apartment. I don't know, it was being flooded, something like that. I don't remember what kind of problem it was. But, I don't know, I was so anxious and worried and I had to go to work and I didn't know what to do. Then we would go on the moped with my boyfriend, but it was raining so we couldn't and I was desperate. And then, I don't know, he said, OK, I know what to do. And we were going to a weird place, like it looked like a fairy tale, like there were ponies. And, I don't know, we... We were there, and they gave me some kind of white cloth made of silk, and I was, I don't know, worried. My boyfriend, he was so peaceful, he was okay, he knew everything was going to be fine, and I was worried. And I told him, I have to go to work, I have to go to work, and I would burst into tears because I had to go to work. And I didn't know what we were doing there, and I was worried. And he was so okay, so in peace, like, okay, don't worry, wait, they're fixing our problem, we're just staying here, give us some time to be together. And I remember me wanting to be intimate with him, but then all of a sudden, my father pops up, and other people, and my friends, and everyone, and I was losing time, I had to go to work, and it was late, it was late. And in the end, in the end I was in my car with another person and a kid, maybe that kid was my son, I don't know, but I had to really rush to work, but I, the time, it was too late. I started at 10 p.m. and it was late and I needed to text my boss that I was going to be late and I would take the wrong route and I was driving, it was so hard to get to work and then, I don't know, we kind of, it was weird and I never made it to work. And there was another part of the dream where I was laying on the grass with a bunch of high school friends And two of them were like talking about finals like they were studying for them preparing for them But like we were 30 like we are so I was like I don't know why you're doing this because I sometimes I Kind of usually dream of still being in high school and having to do my finals But then I realized while in high school that I don't need to go there anymore because I have a degree I went to college and also I have a job. I go to work every day So why am I what am I still doing here? I've already done all of this stuff and I Find someone to complain to it to explain myself to but then I never The dream ends before I can do that. So I was telling these two friends like what are you doing? We already have a high school degree. We don't need to do this. You don't need to do that I'm not doing that. I'm not at all and they were like well But we may have some problems in the future because maybe it wasn't a lot for what we did maybe it was I don't know they were saying a bunch of bullshit and I didn't care because I I Mean I didn't I really didn't care

14 Jul 2024

Dream

Going up to the school I used to go to at Hakone by a train The train is connected to other regions where they aren’t irl Mother’s voice in the back of my head urging me towards where she wants me to go to through the journey Apparently I have to catch a train to Lake Yamanaka I navigate myself through this process like it’s a map of a game stage and I’m a first-person avatar Cloudy warm weather, Gōra station, plum blossoms, melting snow, chilly and warm at the same time Sense of being watched, a pair of eyes peering at me by the corner of my vision no matter where I turn to Scene changes when I decide to break out of mother’s guiding voice and do my own thing Now I’m running away from those pairs of eyes from earlier and their ‘friends’ Turns out they were a part of some group Now the guide of my mother is replaced by some operator’s voice streaming in the back of my head I rush to the school, but even if it looks like it, it doesn’t feel or seem like the one I used to go to irl There’s live concerts being held by some v-kei/kurofuku-kei artists I’m navigating myself through the processions of people and the crowd, sneaking into the backstage studios for some peace and quiet Then I’m somehow at the Italian neighborhoods the next second, the whole school just got done turned into the aesthetic I’m now hiding with a bushy man(Italian), and after he’d start making advances away from the guy Eventually I cave and he fucks my head out in the office room till I pee Then I have to hide the evidences(the stench, the puddles on the floor) before the Principal comes in The guy ran away before I could, now I’m trying to slip out without being noticed by the school’s security people

14 Jul 2024

Dream

A dystopian world where only boys were born and girls had to be made/constrcuted outside of the womb. Also, falling in love didn't exist. But a boy fell in love with his mom's friend's daughter and he also prophecied or predicted that his mom's friend was pregnant with a girl. They were already running away because he had fallen in love so he had resigned himself to never seeing his mother again and was treating the mother of the girl he loved as his true mother. The mother of the girl he loved told him it was impossible, she couldn't be pregnant with a girl since girls could only be made, not born. But she did end up having a baby girl... It was a miracle

12 Jul 2024

Dream

I had a dream where I was pregnant but I didn’t have sex. It was a dream mainly about the birth and afterbirth of TRIPLETS. I forgot their names but there was 2 boys and 1 girl I know that I wanted to name the girl Rosa because I thought it was beautiful. They were very healthy babies and I had a home birth. The last baby to be born had small complications, my mom had to help me get the baby out because it was stuck so I was naked without any pants or underwear on giving birth (ON MY MOMS BED) to a baby in my dream. The baby came out happy and healthy. My mom, Erika, Kailen, Michael, my grandpa, MY DAD, and 2 random guys idk were in the dream btw. I even asked Erika to use her baby stuff for my kids because she didn’t have Adam at the moment. I also hugged my mom in the bathroom and asked how she felt being a grandma at 14 (implying cuz I’m 14) she said she never thought this would happen. I kept making comments about how I was a young mom and I wondered how certain people would react. In the bathroom with my mom I asked her if she thinks my boobs were filling up with milk and she said eh a little but not a lot so I popped my tits out there were stretch marks and bruises everywhere like it looked like I got beat tf up. The babies were all neatly asleep in turquoise pajama’s with little hats. I don’t know why I had this dream but it genuinely scared me.😭