Therapist

12 Jul 2024

Dream

For some reason I had two therapist the one I have in my waking life and another one that was an unfamiliar white man. I went to this outdoor event with a band playing music and my white male therapist was there. We ended up chatting and he was saying something to me and I couldn't make out what he said. He thought I was listening to him but really I didn't hear what he said. He got upset with me for not listening but I explained to him I couldn't hear him over the band. He was pretty defensive but we moved on. Later on I met a new unfamiliar female friend at the event. We chatted and the same thing happened and I couldn't hear something she was saying and she asked me do I need to repeat something to me three times and she mockingly told me something three times and I told her don't do that. I couldn't hear her over the band. Later on we were hanging out and I was telling her about how I’ve experienced losing two friends in my lifetime. The one who broke our friendship a few years ago and another friend I was close to back in college that I distanced myself from her after several instances of her crossing my boundaries. The friend I broke up with I reconnected with her soon after I moved to NC. She apologized for her actions towards the end of our college career and soon after but our friendship never quite became close again. Nor did I ever wanted it to. And now we just follow each other on social media and that's it. When I started to tell her about the friend that broke up with me I decided to pull up our last text message exchange ad share it with her. I pulled something up and started reading it but it wasn't the text from the old friend I quickly realized it was a text message from my white male therapist. Accusing me of lying about not listening and that I lied to him that it was the band. He shared a long paragraph indicating other negative untruthful things about me and that he no longer wanted to be my therapist. But I also felt like the therapist was acting pretty unethical because I had this feeling he romantically liked me. Anywho, after reading it I was really hurt. I was hesitant to share the text with my new unfamiliar friend because he accused me of not listening just like she did earlier but I gave her heads up of that and told her anyways. Later on I met with my black female therapist who is actual my therapist in my waking life. Told her everything that happened with the other therapist and she was very empathetic with me and felt sorry that I experienced that from a fellow therapist. I felt seen and heard like I usually do with my therapist. Later on I went to a party and I saw my therapist there. We chatted and quickly became actual friends. I was dating this guy and it was early on in our dating life and after several interactions he became pretty pushy. There was a moment I told him I really liked him and he told me he loved me. Which I thought was weird cause it was very early on. And he flirtingly insisted I tell him I love him back which I didn't want to but I did cause I didn't want to make me feel bad. I felt love-bombed and I got a feeling that I was starting a new abusive cycle similar to the one I had with my abusive ex in my waking life at the beginning of our relationship but it just looked differently. Later on my therapist was realizing how pushy my date was being to me and she decided to stand up for me and tell him to back off and stop treating me that way. She later on told me this isn't something I wouldn't do as a therapist but since we're friends now I can do that. We hugged and I felt bitter sweet. Because I was happy to have her as friend but I also knew that meant she had to terminate our therapist-and-client relationship because it would be unethical for us to still be connected this way. I was worried about finding a new therapist because she was the first therapist in my waking life I really felt fully connected to and I've made significant progress with. All my other therapist weren't the right fit. Later on in the dream, I was hanging out with a bunch of people seemingly friends but my estranged brother was also there. We were playing different outdoor games like football and soccer. I helped kick off the games and get everyone excisted to play we would start playing and then when my brother decided to leave to do something else people would stop and start following him. In the last game we started to play soccer and he went inside to do something else and folks just started playing. And I asked why folks were folks were leaving and not interested in playing anymore and it was basically because my brother left. I hated that. It was like folks followed up and didn't think for themselves. It kind of remind me in our waking life before I stopped speaking to my brother he was a devout Christian and a pastor. Very gifted preacher and at some point became a youth pastor at a church in Randolph, MA. After a few years he wasn't seeing eye to eye with the main pastor there and decided to leave, a lot of folks left the church as well. He attempted to start his own church and that kind of dwindled down but he still had devout followers one of which was one of his youth members at the old church and they started dating. She was 15 when they met and he was 27. They didn't have a relationship beyond pastor and member until she became of legal age soon after she went to college and they started to like each other more than friends. A few years ago he converted into a Black Hebrew Isrealite. We started to become more distant soon after I went off to college and he became a youth pastor but I decided to stop speaking with him altogether soon after he became a Black Hebrew Isrealite. He was more unbearable, condescending and patronizing. It was miserable to speak and relate to him. Now we're completely estranged and he married that young woman he basically groomed. The dream ended with everyone not playing soccer anymore and i had this feeling of annoyance against my brother again and I once again kept my distance from him.

4 Jul 2024

Dream

I was in a group activity and it was facilitated by some sort of therapist or counselor. The activity entailed a writing component about yourself and the other partner. We were instructed to glue the two writing components together, though only the top paper could be read. I had an excited feeling that I understood the activity and what the therapist was trying to accomplish or demonstrate. That was: partners are similar and alike in many ways. The glued writing piece was then mounted on one’s side of a faded yellow construction paper. There was some childlike drawings on the remaining half of the colored paper. The project along with other in the group were hung from the ceiling as a sort of display.

23 Jun 2024

Dream

I I had a dream where I was talking to a therapist and I was talking about billionaires, how I met a couple of them. And then my therapist said, well, it seems like you're seeking revenge because you have been a compass what you want to do in life.

21 Jun 2024

Dream

כל המשפחה שלי הזמינה אוכל בלעדיי, וראיתי הכל מהחלון בחדר שלי ונכנסתי להתקף זעם רציני וצעקתי עליהם ממש וכל מה שרציתי זה שיבקשו סליחה והם לא היו מוכנים וזה רק שיגע אותי יותר ואז כדי לעורר את אמא שלי אמרתי לה שהמטפלת שלי אמרה שאנחנו לא נהיה בקשר אם היא תמשיך בהתנהגות הזאת ואז היא אמרה בקול מפחיד כזה “אני יודעת, את חושבת שאני לא יודעת? כבר מאז שאת בת שבע״ ואז היא אמרה שהמטפלת שלי לא מכירה אותי באמת ואף אחד לא מכיר מנ אני באמת ושאני שטן. ואז עזבתי את הבית לאיזו חברה מוכרת בחול עם בעלים ישראליים ונסעתי למדינה אחרת באוטובוס ובהתחלה כולם דיברו אנגלית עד שכולם הבינו שכולם ישראלים.

19 Jun 2024

Dream

I had a dream about my friends Snapchat profile and he had a bio and it said "I don't need your therapists or TikToks to be ok" and I liked his profile and was thinking about how I should make mine

18 Jun 2024

Dream

I was in the waiting room where I attend therapy, waiting for my therapist. She came out to welcome me and I got up and followed her to the room where we would be talking. As we approached the door she stopped to let me pass, I walked into the room first and saw my ex partner sitting in there. I turned around to face my therapist but she was gone and the door was closed. The room was not how it is in real life, it had no windows and the button on the wall to release the door was gone so I couldn't get out. He started to walk towards me, then went to grab me and I woke up. Remember feeling scared in the dream, woke up feeling like I was still there.

16 Jun 2024

Dream

I was laying in bed crying talking to my therapist

12 Jun 2024

Dream

So, the part there I start remembering, so I was sitting in the tram, I was on my way home from vacation, and there was little mountains and beautiful sceneries, we were always driving through with the tram, and eventually I made it home, and, oh I'm not sure if I ended up somewhere, where I ended up, but, yeah, then there was, I went to my therapist, I think, and, because she's got a free appointment for me, like a spontaneous one, and, but she didn't expect me, so, first of all, it was like a nice big room, like a nice big flat almost, in a loft apartment, with a nice view and big windows, and receptionists kind of brought me to the room, but she was a bit surprised that I came, and opened the door to my therapist, she was expecting someone else, so she'd already prepared, she was wearing a costume, it was like a weird doppler stripe, and all like, stripes or whatever, which were meant to trigger her, and, I was half naked somehow, I don't know, and, yes, she was a bit embarrassed, and then she realised that, you know, I had an appointment, and then we went somewhere, and we did like a, we did like another thing, it was more intense, more exposure, and, and somehow there were other patients there as well, and we went outside, and in this kind of city escape, and it was a little bit more cuddly than an usual city, somehow, like a bit like, not really comic, comic-ish, but it felt like that, and one of the people was, I'm not sure what his problem was, but he was psychotic, or he had some kind of weird condition, and, and then I just remembered that we were kind of, we went shopping, me and him, and his, his milk, someone just randomly opened his milk that he was pot-purchasing, and I tipped it out, just to trigger him, and he was like, incredibly intrigued by that, and so he started going crazy, and, and people didn't really understand that, so they started trying to, trying to capture him, or something, like police, or whatever, and he is well-versed, so he just started running away, and he, he, yeah, I think, I also remember somehow, we were driving around the tram again, and there was someone else, I don't remember most of the people, honestly, anyway, and he was running through the city at night, and then suddenly I was him, and I was running, running, running, running, and at some point I ended up at a bookshop, sort of, like a really nice cafe, and he said, it was me, that he should go inside, or I went inside, and I just basically said, explained what was going on, as it was the most normal thing in the world, and they were kind of happy, actually, that I went there, I felt comfortable there, and then my dad sat down next to me, it was kind of a statement, and, you know, we waited basically for, I think, I don't know, for the police, or someone else, outside, somehow, and, yeah, we went to my dad's place, to get dinner, and then I kind of woke up.

11 May 2024

Dream

I dreamt I was meeting with my clinician and she actually heard my concerns. Then I was an actress and my costar cuddled me and told me I need to shower. But he was okay with it. He still liked me.

3 May 2024

Dream

I was mediating a break up between my boyfriend and myself but I was acting as a 3rd party. It was basically two of me and I was mediating. He refused to leave and was making it difficult even though he had no right to any assets. I owned everything and he came into the relationship with nothing. It wasn’t until we went to a therapist who was able to help and he finally told me what he wanted. The dream ended with us separating.

30 Apr 2024

Dream

I dreamt I was looking for new friends in the train. I also was looking for a therapist

25 Apr 2024

Dream

I was asleep in my dream and dreamt of being at my therapists home. Then I woke up in a house full of people and couldn't work out if my dream was real. There was a gay man in my dream and he had a massive bag of lego that I sat in. We were in an apartment and then I was walking through a special opening of a shop, I was wearing a dress and heels. A woman approached me and wanted to do my hair and make up for the opening show. I said yes. Then woke up.