Sadness

7 Nov 2024

Dream

i had a dream i saw my favorite teacher and i hugged him but when i saw his face he started crying and i got sad because i really missed him

6 Nov 2024

Dream

I just woke up from a nightmare. I had a dream. I have been there very big house like my own childhood house with all my families relative we all around each other. It was a night time my sister and my cousins her sleeping in the first floor like Mollaee and there was a noise coming from upstairs Seems like there is a kind of argue between young people upstairs and my son was sleeping in the room and other kids also I tried to protect them from the noise. Don’t wake them up. I saw people are coming to downstairs soon. Come on stop making noise children are sleeping here While I was trying to see this young people come upstairs and downstairs in the store. Seems like they called police they’re waiting for police. I just tried to hold the door and don’t let them come in and make noise so I talking to them to stop and be quiet. All of a sudden 2 boys came inside and they start talking to us and they making arguments and they told them keep it calm. Children are sleeping while they were talking and it was lots of 10 around outside. The weather is very bad like storm is coming. I hold the door to don’t let the storm paint open the door Very strong wind was very strong and then it pushed us away and opened the hallway door which is open under from the balcony and push a subway. I just throw myself on the top of my son to keep him safe and this is strong coming and passing through from the other door and make lots of damage Other people coming from other rooms and then we gathering what just happen and it was so satisfied that a cute save my son then I walk around and I was looking after T-shirts and pants to change my clothes because it was super dirty. My other cousin came and help try to help me to find some of my clothes in that chaos And then all of a sudden I saw the house is coming down. It seems like there is something is going like like earthquake then stopped and then when I looked outside I saw two other houses other side of street they are partly gone into the Earth and they were disappeared. I told my mother wow look at her The other one of the in the basement of those houses. I kept my money and I told my mother wow look at the other side. The houses are gone but the part I was saving my money there is still there why we were talking. Have you been looking at the house and we try all around each other to get some sleep And then it comes another earthquake? We all woke up like we had roof and it was such a chaos everywhere I hold my son and like people was just some of the people was missing again and I look at the other side. I saw the other part of two houses which was still on the surface. They were gone as well and then look at my mother and I said oh my mother The part I saved my money is there also gone now and my mother said yeah but mine not and did you take pick up your money and she said yes yeah well my money are gone why we were talking is another earthquake and we so all of a sudden is coming hot melting Liquid coming from the mountain is coming to our house. It seems like there is no way to be survive this liquid coming to our houses Office that I jumped on the wall and this liquid is coming to Saeede though I still survive. I couldn’t see anyone else from my family. I try to find a way to see where can I go to keep myself safe While I was trying to find a safe place and I found the kind of on the top went on the top of mountain while all the people coming down. I went up climbing up and I was almost in and all of a sudden about my son where is my son? I couldn’t find him in this chaos And I feel kind of bad because I didn’t even look around for him. I just assume he has been gone and I lost him so I found a safe place between trees and climb up the trees to see around. I saw there is a helicopter is coming and cut the people Always on the trees on the top with a cutter and I understood that there is a plan seems like the government wants to killing everybody. Don’t want anybody to survive and I told myself why I am trying to keep myself survive and try to leave. What should I leave for when everybody has died and they lost everybody there is no point to leave And my son is gone and I always feel sad. I didn’t know why I’m trying to just leave and keep surviving I was thinking about that and I saw two kids playing by the side of the kind of River of this hot quiet coming from Mount they’re playing. I miss my son oh my God maybe if my sonic survive him rescue him he was here and play with them. I was so tired on silent and come to the ages and look at that that’s how we liquid things coming running out from the mountain so maybe I should go back and check for him so the liquid things is still going down the hill. I was so unsure that is there any chance to find him or maybe after he’s finished all people who has been so gathering and maybe I will find him Couldn’t find any reason to leave it out then all people has been super gathered by the government and be controlled by the government and there is no point to live so I saw other people like there was a bicycle trying to skate but she was come and Fall into that river and she was she gone as well so I was in this dream and sudden and woke up and find myself a safe place. I was very very sad dream

30 Oct 2024

Dream

I had a dream I was in Texas but hosting a dinner for my grandparents, or at first, the dining room was open. And then guests started to come in. My friend Landon came. I then went to the bathroom and that was when more and more guests came. People kept trying to open the bathroom door when I was in it. My stepbrothers, I remember. Then I cracked the door open to tell them I was using the bathroom. Then I then was done. I think I might have been procrastinating taking a shower in there, but I only used the bathroom. I then left and saw my grandma and grandpa and hugged both of them. I also saw my uncle, Emilio and was only able to give him a high five because his “new girlfriend” or friend who was a girl was in the way. I then saw my aunt at the door and she didn't see me. I then left for some reason. Then I was locked out of the dinning room where everyone was. My friend Landon was locked out too, but it was because he wasn't family, but I was. I think we were locked out of a family dinner, but I was forgotten. Sad dream. Everyone else in the family ate except me. Landon was watching funny videos and I tried to watch with him so I didn't get sad and think. The end.

23 Oct 2024

Dream

My Grandmother was talking to me with sadness in her voice. She said she was praying for me that I would fix my gospel and that I would find the true gospel. I told her that I've found the true gospel of Jesus Christ in the Catholic Church and it made her cry. It made me sad but also I felt defensive and angry with her that I could not reason with her or show her the beauty and majesty of the Catholic Church.

22 Oct 2024

Dream

I was sitting in an office writing at a desk. There was a huge black and white myler balloon that is loosely tied to the desk with other balloons. Around the windows were see through curtains and I could see the  parking lot that had cars. I saw a door push open and out came a man with black hair and was wearing a blue suit. I knew his name was Joey but I didn’t recognize the man. He looked mad because I was in trouble. He saw me getting wrote up. I looked back in the hallway and he was gone. Joey walked away and disappeared. Then I was fighting with my old Soledad HR, Erica and Ally, calling them names and trashing the place. I was walking around in a maze type building buying stuff online. I received a lot of different sizes and styles of mirrors, kids swing sets, and weird storage shelves that gave away to my peers. I then took super glue and smeared it all over the time clock and started throwing gel balls at people to scare them. I took a break at work could not walk because my shoes felt as if they were tied together. I looked down and they were just untied but it was so hard to walk. Nobody would talk to me as I walked around. I felt so lost and lonely. I couldn’t find Jenny anywhere. I could feel her close by, I just couldn’t see her. I tried calling Jenny and no answer. I looked around and saw that she was sitting alone without me. I felt sad and lonely. And I could feel that she missed me as well.

19 Oct 2024

Dream

This dream actually pissed me off a little bit. I. This dream it went through the whole day of getting ready and going to the airport. Not everybody in the house was going. And the ones that were going weren’t necessarily all going to the same place. I’ve been in this house before in dreams and they’re usually mildly unpleasant, similar to this one. While in the house I don’t remember much but I do remember a constant low level of discomfort. So we get to the airport and im kind of like the lone wolf in the airport. Everybody is with somebody for the most part except me. It honestly seemed like cliques. Now there’s this one clique of guys I keep seeing everywhere. Very tall and wide guys with longer hair. One of them, the biggest with long spiral curl hair that reaches a lil past his shoulders, kept giving me shit everytime they saw me. Just slight bullying every single time. They never touch me. Just words. Like I even saw them when I got my food and was worried they would fuck with my food like the bullies in middle school used to do. But no just words. But just enough words and laughter to put me in a bad mood. After I eat I’m overall able to shake it and I go roaming the airport. It’s getting close to time for the flight and I realize I’ve left my sleep token hoodie over by where I was sitting to eat. When I get over there I see a stack of black hoodies similar to mine and that same group of guys going through it. I try to get over there before the biggest one sees mine but of course I don’t make it and he takes it like it’s his. I tell him it’s mine and before he even says anything I hear “he’s not gunna give it back.” I respond In thought saying “I know but I want to try it’s mine and I like that one.” He then responds and says “looks like it’s mine now” with this smug ass grin that infuriates me and I briefly consider trying to rip it off of him but alas he’s bigger than me and stronger. And all of the people in his group are as well. I then briefly consider trying to convince the red head guy who’s been marginally nicer but only to the extent of not bullying me himself since he hasn’t stopped his friends but the. Think better of it because why would he help now he hasn’t before 🙄 so I’m looking at this massive dude with MY Sleep Token hoodie becoming increasingly upset because I’m not sure what to do to get my hoodie back and I start to feel my face change reflecting my emotions and i start mentally telling myself not to make the puppy dog eyes not to make the doe eyes not to let my hurt feelings show and I’m just watching him the whole time I’m mentally telling myself this knowing full well it either won’t stop the look spreading across my face or, if I am successful in stopping the hurt look from spreading across my face, I will most certainly look some kind of crazy or deranged. And he’s just got this weird half smile half grimace on his face and then I wake up irritated because the whole thing reminded me of middle school one the one big asshole tried to steal my Oreo cakesters in the bus just because he was bigger than me and knew i couldn’t do anything about it truly. And at the same time I pissed at myself because I should know to look out for myself and my things because people are constantly ass holes like this. But I don’t want to have to constantly prepare myself for people to be assholes that’s so exhausting and so guarded. I’m upset

14 Oct 2024

Dream

Infection house I was in my home, and father was going to a luxury mosque, so I get dressed up to go there to pray, but when I get out side of my house, I wasn't wearing my shirt, but I was wearing my mother's shirt with frills, I wanted to change my clothes to go to the luxury mosque, I tell my dad, he said he was already late so he can't wait for me, I feel sad as his car goes away from our house. Then I went inside, but then I saw my dad inside the house, I thought he already went. I ask my mom for help, but she doesn't understand what I am searching, so I tried so hard to explain it to her, she told me it is in the rack, but at the rack, I saw weird cheap versions of the clothes that I were searching for, Then I asked her again multiple times, until she understands, then she pointed where the clothes are and then I took it and wore it, the clothes were a gift from my grandpa And then I went back to my room and played more games, it's night outside, I hear electricity beeps, and the light goes off, it is darkness, my father haven't paid electricity bill yet. And all of the lamps are broken, the only thing we had is only flashlights. I also sin using my phone. And played some more game. Then there was an "outbreak", I got a disease, which then I had to sleep in a bed full of bacteria, so that my infection could get killed by other bacterias, which can infect me, I sleep on the bacteria bed and woke up from the dream.

14 Oct 2024

Dream

dream of that uh we were in the building and then it started collapsing and my cousin zan like we haven't met for years my cousin he died he died in the collapsed building it was terrifying to see the building collapse it's scary and also dream of that i died in my dream i also remember that my two elder brother cousins died like i live in joint family and everyone in the family like children are dying like i'm going to meet my cousin sister this month of the end of the month and in dream i saw her right in front of my eyes i was terrified and shattered she had died and i was crying very badly in the dream like i love her so much she died all my dreams and future to spend time with her all just broke it was a very sad dream

11 Oct 2024

Dream

I was in a school reunion, and I was having fun. This one girl made a project or smtng and wanted to show me it, so we left the room where everyone was at and went down the hallway to one of the classes. The class didn't have many desks and looked very untidy but clean. She showed me a movie of some sorts and I'm all impressed. I even eat gummy bears which I'm not suppose to eat. Then I realize she dissapeared and another guy that was there also dissapeared, so I go back to the room where everyone else was but I find that the door is patched and there's a wall there, I look around the room and I see that I'm in my kitchen. I start going berserk. I say something along the lines of "I lost those years forever", I was sad I couldn't go back to highschool and be a teenager, since I'm not shy anymore. I start breaking stuff in my kitchen and then I fall to the floor on my knees. Then I wake up inside my dream and check if the damage done was real or not. It wasn't real so then I actually wake up.

9 Oct 2024

Dream

i had a dream about looking at a planogram about displaying pandora jewelry because i used to work there. my friend nikki was there with me too and i told her its super helpful. and she got overwhelmed and feeling sad. so i asked her why, her response was “it was just a long drive” and i told her that got nothing to do with this context. i don’t think we’re talking about the same thing? and she started telling me about the long trip she had and i was just trying to comfort her

27 Sep 2024

Dream

I was playing an online game with an AI companion, and at first they were an opponent, until we teamed up after a while. They were very good at the game, and I wasn't quite as good but it was a comfort game I liked to play a lot. After a while of playing, I said to the AI, "I know you don't have feelings, but I appreciate your companionship and time to play these games with me." There was a long pause before they answered something like "thank you for your kind words" before changing games. I then found them on a different game a while later. This one didn't have a voice chat, like the last one did. I tried to get the AI's attention by spinning in circles, trying to tell them non-verbally that this is the same person they played with on a different game. I had the same usernames on both games. It took a few tries, but they seemed to understand after a while. We played very well together, but I had this sinking feeling that they didn't remember me from the last time we played together. Even then I didn't quite care, but it did make me slightly sad that this AI actually does not have feelings and memory, and it would take many more tries to become 'friends' if given the chance

12 Sep 2024

Dream

Blooming rains : For what is all of this? I dreamed of doing a sin, and went to my bathroom to clean myself to shower, and then I wore my clothes and stay in the bathroom that I have in my house, I sat in the toilet closet I ponder in the bathroom, I remember that I once had a great aunt, she is very nice to me, she has curly hair, but she isn't with me here... Anymore. My aunt got sexually abused, she got abused bad, I do not remember clearly how. After I ponder, I saw a hanger, there was a plastic bag hanging with lots of goods, it is from my uncle, I don't care anymore. I don't want that plastic with goods anymore, I don't want his gifts anymore, I want him to stop sending me gifts. I ponder and asked myself, "what am I here for?", " Why am I like this?", "why is everything like this?", " Why is.. This?. " I feel hopeless and sad, but I am so emotionless that I couldn't even cry, no hopes, I thought I would be better, but there is no progress. It was raining outside too, I went out, and soak myself in rain, looking at the pavement and trees in my yard.