Panic

29 Oct 2024

Dream

I am constantly feeling my teeth in my mouth with my tongue which damages it. I keep feeling them in my mouth until it feels like they fall out. I am in the massive basement of the greenhouse and and I am looking in the mirror I see that they didn't fall out but they do have holes in them from me constantly checking them with my tongue. I panic, the stress makes me want to die and I consider killing myself but I decide not to do it, as although the erosion of my teeth has left massive holes in them they can still be fixed. I was hoping that it wasn't real and tried to wish myself awake, I couldn't, then just as I begin to accept that this might be real I am able to open my eyes and wake up.

27 Oct 2024

Dream

I was participating in a huge murder game show. It was like a huge piramid but with a couple of stages that were the battlefield. I came in together with my boyfriend and we both had an item. When the game started it wasn’t long untill we found eachother and started surviving. For some reason i had my phone and i saw that an acquaintance was also doing the game so i look for him a few steps above. I talk to him and his group and they explain more about the game and how to survive. The piramid is high in the air and if you jumped you would die but nobody knew exactly how you would die. So at some point my boyfriend is already dead and i sort of made a new friend. I finally have a weapon because my boyfriend died it is a long big bread knife. We found a place to hide with a door so i started cooking a delicious meal to eat so if i finally got teammates like the guy from above told me i should get, we wouldn’t want to eat eachother. So now we had 2 teams on the battlefield. Mine and one with only boys. Only one of the boys found me cooking and got into my hiding room. I told him he could eat my meal and rape me if he did not murder me. And that is what happened. He started raping me. After that the show went on and i kept imaging to just jump and give up but i was scared of the pain of jumping in the weird air. the end of the round started coming and it became clear that only 11 people could pass to the next level. I was alone climbing through bushes low to the air what seemed to be a sea now. Some of the boys of the other team were sitting there and i did not know how to pass. I wanted to swim but i kept seeing huge fishes with huge mouths that were opening to the up side. Everytime i though a fish would dissapear an even bigger one with a bigger mouth came to the surface. So i had to go up past the boys from the other team. I did this and for some reason it just ended up in more sex. After that we all had to go to a sort of lined up thing of cubes that was floating in the water. Next to it was a really high cliff so you either needed to jump or swim to it. Someone jumped but the water wasn’t set to safe yet. Then a timer went off some people started jumping in the cube thing. My friend was one of the first and they were panicking and holding onto it but almosy drowning. Then slowly a playform came up and i jumped to the first spot that said “1” So i knew i would get the best place in the next round. I had good teammates and the other team wanted to fuck me so kept me alive. With a good feeling i went to the next level. But before it started i woke up

20 Oct 2024

Dream

I dreamt I had two tiny birds as pets, the green female was only the size of the tip of my thumb, and the blue male the size of the tip of my pinkie finger! They were so round and cartoon-like, the cutest, most delicate creatures I had even seen. I adored them. They lived in a mushoom that was shaped like a cup. I had to move them at some point so I picked up the mushroom clumsily, with one hand instead of two, and the delicate sides of the cup crumpled a little bit. When I relocated it and looked inside, the birds were still, lifeless. I panicked, but the female moved a little and I realised they weren't dead, but that I'd accidentally suffocated them, but not enough to kill them. The dream changed before I could see if the male, the smallest one, was recovering too.

19 Oct 2024

Dream

My boyfriend and I were trying to have quality time but his family kept interrupting us, his little sister and little brother needed to be babysat, and we were in a pod world, where people didn't live in houses, they lived in pods. I was leaving my boyfriend pod, he said he was gonna take me put the next day and it was surprise, but I had vision in the dream about the future and I knew what was going to happen before it happened. He was going to take me to mcdonalds, but I had a vision of a man who was about to shoot the mcdonalds. He turns to my boyfriend and said "back the fuck up, right now," and then he grabs his gun and starts shooting everyone at mcdonalds and then it was like I was in dimensions of time where he gives a different response everytime and the reaction is different based on his actions. Each one he's confused and doesn't understand why this man is telling him to back up, then one reality is where I was panicking and I knew he was about to shoot my boyfriend and I yell at him to back up and he doesn't back up and gets shot and then I take the car and try to drive it backwards and go to his mom and tell her what happened. I was running away from this shooter, he got in his car and started chasing me. Blood on my hands. I dial 911 and the police come and get him. Something about litering tomato's. I saw my boyfriend and it was like he came through a time chamber and he consulted me. We went to a carnival to get on rides and stuff and then I remember seeing live music and it was like I was talking to higher being about music and they were saying the best islands and best places with the best live music and one was an island and I started to fly and I floating and flying on the way to the island and I was still high in the sky and I remember being over the ocean and I was afraid cause I couldn't swim, so I was to trying to go back to land and I couldn't decend and it was freaking me out and I suddenly felt like I couldn't breath or like I was dying, and I was telling myself to wake up and make sure I wasn't dying and I was trying to wake up and I just couldn't wake up. Until I woke and I couldn't move my body.

16 Oct 2024

Dream

I was randomly accused of committing a crime that I didn't do. My husband, family, and friends were distressed and tried to protest, but nobody listened. I was forcibly taken by the government and sentenced to death, and told it would be painless. I was panicking but trying to come to terms with everything, but too much was happening all at once. I was taken aside and injected with something, but then strangely was set loose to the outside world to die rather than under supervision like it's normally done. I wandered into a nearby parking lot and found a secluded parking spot to lie down and die on. As I felt the drugs start to kick in I began to think about my friends and family, but especially my husband. The parking lot became busy and I kept getting up and trying to find a new spot to die peacefully. Despite having been told the death would be painless it isn't, I felt great painless, agony, and a spreading tingling across my body. I began to think about how nice it would be to be reincarnated and see my family again. I thought that perhaps it would be nice to reincarnate as a dog and be adopted by them, because dogs can't get falsely accused of such serious crimes. As my consciousness began to fade I suddenly had a thought, that even if I were to reincarnate there was no guarantee I would be with my family again. I began to feel panicked once more. I struggled to my feet and stumbled forward trying to find someone to help me, as the pain became excruciating and everything began to fade to black, panic consuming me.

16 Oct 2024

Dream

In the dream I was talking with Corey and in the game he had changed from his usual tall handsome Au'ra man to a miqo'te. He changed to a cat boy. He was saying how his friends were referring to him as their princess. He was laughing about it but I was upset. I woke up in a panic. Woke up from the dream and ran to check lodestone to see if his character changed and thank God it's still the same Au'ra.

15 Oct 2024

Dream

I was outside. There was like a block party of some kind because there was music and people were dancing, talking and hanging out In the street and on people's porches. I was on one them porches just looking out and enjoying people I recognize dance and have fun. I was enjoying myself. There was this guy to my right sitting on the porch with some of his friends but I could tell he was watching me every so often. And there was this other guy who was inside the home who's porch I was sitting on and he was busy working or something but something was pushing me to go in. And it felt like as soon as the party started it was ending there was a slew of commotion and people were leaving. I took it as a sign to go inside the home. But the guy who was sitting on the porch beside me decided to speak but to only tell me to go home. Not to go inside the house. Buy I didn't listen. I went inside the house. Butbi felt like I had to because part of the commotion was this man was acting erratic and I didn't trust him at all. He kept walking towards me like he specifically looking for me. So I went into the house where the other man was. When I approached him je was sitting on a stool and had a white doctors coat on. He gave an aura of I can trust you and made me feel sage. But I could hear and see the man outside from the windows go around and around til I heard him enter somewhere in another building that was connected to the home. I realize now we were in some type of office tht was connected to some type of hospital or Doctors office because it smell like one and through the blinds it resembled a Doctors office. Somehow that erratic man came through another opening and was in the Doctors office. I was hiding at this point behind a sort of a counter top and I had this bad feeling come over. And I was hoping he wouldn't find an entrance to where we were. This whole while I was panicking the man on the stool was just smiling like everything was alright like he couldn't sense our immediate danger. But alas, the erratic man found entry and came in. At this point thought the man on the stool got up as If to greet the man or something, but then the erratic man skip the other man and straight for me. But for some reason I had a knife in my hand and before he can even touch me I stabbed and sliced his stomach open thin his neck. I had killed him. The other man was just a smiling. But he beckon me to come with him. And I did. He lead me outside back on the porch and again another man swiftly walked up on me and before I can even think I still had the knife in my and stabbed and sliced him up as well. I felt satisfied and relieved after killing both of them. I felt that the danger was clear and I can breath. But then the other in man in the white coat was briskly walking and he was talking to me but I don't remember what he said. But he lead me to a big window where he opened it from the bottom and stepped aside so I could go first. And I did. When I got through the window on the other side there was thick glass and it came down but left like a couple inches of the ground when I tried to slide through only my legs got through and it stopped at my butt. I couldn't fit under the glass. And as I was doing this the man never followed me through the glass. He slid it down with a bang and was smiling at me. I scrambled to the window trying to get it open but I couldn't. I was surrounded by glass in front of me in the back of me and on the sides. He's face changed. Something like he was pleased that he's plan worked or something. I fell straight into his trap. And then he was gone. Then it dawned on me that I was stuck in a glass box with noone to come rescue me. I was going to starve to death and that exactly what he wanted. He wanted me to kill those men but something told me those men was not the danger. he was. I did he's bidding for him. With everything inside me I starred banging on the glass and til finally it did shatter. But what I mistaken as snow was white painted metal covering the window like vines. It had the same thing on the window to the back of me. when I finally realized I was not getting out I woke up.

15 Oct 2024

Dream

My sister and I were alone for a few days in my hometown and we were staying at this hotel. We would go out everyday visting the mall, shopping, doing stuff around town together. It was very cold outside and I was constantly cold. I remember before going out i would put on alot of makeup and alot of accessories. Lots of necklaces and earrings and i dressed up in things that werent really my style in real life and i knew that but i was enjoying trying something new. I would constantly worry about my sister as she would always want to be independent and didnt want me constantly watching over her. She disappeared once and I had a panic atack. I ran outside to go look for her and waited in the bus station but it was too late, she had already taken the bus away. I started crying and then my parents showed up. They were worried but calm, somehow their words were comforting but were also subtly making me feel very guilty. The sky was grey and the air was frosty biting at my areas of exposed skin. The air smelled of pollution and had a sourness to it. I was extremely sad that my sister left and i knew it would be a long time until i saw her again. Eventually my family all split up. My dad and sister lived alone for the time being as my mom and i were away and i lived with my boyfriend Alex in the big city. We were going to same college. And old building with a strange comfort to it. It was also surrounded by birds and black cats. Alex and i were driving to the college one morning and i heard my phone ring and it was my mom. She was frantic. My sister had had a freak out and injured my dad and then comitted suicide by slitting her throat. Mentally i was teleported there for a few seconds and i could see what happened. My dad was sitting down in the living room with deep stab wounds in his arms and stomach. His head hung therr motionless, he was alive however unconscious. I started violently trembling as i walked down the hallway to my sister’s bedroom. There on the yellowish wall was a huge splatter of blood it went almost to the ceiling. She sat slumped against the wall, her head rested on her shoulder in an unatural way. Her open eyes still staring at me after death. The wound in her neck gaped open and blood still slowly oozed down the her shirt. The air had a sour metallic sting and the atmosphere was heavy and dizzying. I panicked and cried and screamed. There was no way i was going to accept that this just happened. I was horribly affected by what i had seen and i knew i would never recover. My dad was rushed to the hospital and my sister to the funeral home. I rememberd how much i had loved her and how i would have done anything for her to keep her alive. It felt like someone took a million knives and started twisting them around in my heart. I was never the same after that. Alex and I eventually ended up going to the college and there was this party going on there. We were starting to get to know people. It was hard at first and I felt alone even though surrounded by so many. The girls kept excluding me from their group and i started befriending the boys and the tomboy girls. It actually went well and we started hanging out. Alex was on the outside of all of this as he believed that everyone at school were peasonts and he didnt want to associate himself with a lower class. I hated his arrogance however i tried to ignore it for my own benefit. One guy offered me some drugs. He offered me molly and i knew i couldnt say no. In my waking life i have done molly before and i rememberd how beautiful and comfortable and euphoric it made me feel. I wanted something to wash away the pain so bad. As the molly started coming up i could feel waves of happiness and love just washing over me. With every wave it was like the horrible things i had seen were slwoly fading, wave by wave. Alex left, apparently he had something more important to do. I was scared what his reaction would be when he came back and saw me high but also i didnt care so much. I told myself that he never had to endure such horrible things in his life like i did. Somehow, and very suddenly i had a very intense flashback and it sent my spiraling. Suddenly i saw people for what they really were. Everyone there was a snake besides maybe one or two people. I went into one of the room and I told them im not feeling ok. One girl told me she’ll go get me some water but when he tried to open the door, there was a wall behind the door, when i tried to open the window, there was nothing but wall there. Suddenly claustrophbia and paranoia started setting in. I remembered very vividly the scene with my sister and my head started spinning. Again i started screaming that it did not happen. I grabbed a random knife that was sitting on yhr table and started cutting myself. My high had turned into a maddening delusion and i wanted to rip myself out of my own skin. Voices and colors were distorted and it felt like i was in hell. The modern art designs and pictures and statues that lined the corridors suddenly were speaking to me all at once in a deafening conglomerate of madness. I passed out eventually and alex came back. I was sober now, and i told him im not doing ok but i didnt tell him about the molly as to not cause an arguement. He asked me why and i told him that mentally im very damaged by what i saw. He just stared at me coldly and shrugged. He said he has more important stuff to do and told me to go home. He then left. I felt really lonely and I tried reaching out to old friends. I really needed someone to stick with me during this time. I spoke to my cousin and we agreed to see each other in the city. We had old fights in the past but now we were mostly over them. As i was getting out of the subway station the exit was extremely narrow and claustrophobic. I noticed other people struggling to get through but they didnt complain as if it was completely normal. I got angry. I had had to deal with crap like this for so long and no one seemed to care. As i was coming out the exit i got enraged and i started pounding in it out of frustration. It ended up breaking and i was so confused because i thought it was concrete. It was actually cardboard that looked like concrete. I felt relieved and i did not feel bad at all for breaking it. Then a security gaurd came to me and started berating me in front of everyone for breaking the exit/entrance to the subway station. I didnt care that he was mad. I didnt care at all about breaking anything until my cousin came and said that I was embarassing. She said i should have just tried my best to squeeze through that exit and not break anything. She said i should pay back for repairs and to be more self aware next time. I was really embarassed and i regreted breaking it now. We then ate a fastfood together and even though i was a little mad at her we ended up having a good time. Afterwards, we went back to the college and this time i invited her to come as well. There was this party going on and there were lots of people there. Big flashing colorful lights and disco music filled the atmosphere. There was of course drugs and drinking and people fucking in the extra rooms. At this party there was this man that was trying to induce us all in a hypnotic state. Amnesiec almost. His voice guided us as we slowly lost control over our consciousness and our subconscious took control. Everyone there was seeing what they wanted to see, blissful hallucinations dreamlike trances. Everything was ethereal and extraordinary. As i was looking around i saw this girl. She was beautiful and she told me to follow her. She led me farther from the main group of people, and in that moment of pure euphoria like no drug can induce she looked at me in the eyes and we started making out. It was beautiful. We were intertwined and it felt like we had a connection beyond just our physical bodies. Her soul felt magical and gorgeous. Her hair was dark, long and flowy and she had whisps of silver and gold in it. Her lips were soft and comforting. I felt something when i kissed her that i never felt before. Suddenly i felt a hand grab me away from her. I looked and it was my dad. I felt so happy to see him but also confused as to what he was doing there and why he pulled me away from that girl. He told me to look again at the person i was just making out with. It was a boy. A random ugly boy from school that i wouldnt kiss for 100 dollars. I was horrified. I was so entranced that i couldn’t see who i was really kissing. Everything was in my head. I was terrified because i knew the trouble i would be in with alex. Alex usually didnt have a probelm with me kissing girls but of course he had a problem with me kissing boys. I would have never kissed that girl if i knew she was a boy. But i knew he would never believe me. I hated that at one point we were going to have this conversation and he would question my loyalty. Deep down however i knew that i was not guilty because i know what i saw and who i thought i was kissing. I was even more paranoid that people took pictures or filmed the whole thing and were going to send it to alex. That caused me to panic but my dad was there for me and tried to calm me down. He took me in his car and said he wanted to show me something. I noticed him. He was pale and skinny, still addicted to his drugs. Even though he seemed to look worse it also seemed that something in him chnaged after my sister took her life. He seemed to have found himself but in a twisted way. He took me and my mom in the car and we drove up this mountain. It felt so strange to be just us now. Life felt vacant without my sister. At the top of the mountain there was this cabin. Inside was this asian man. He was gentle and had kind eyes. He was a sculptor. He made statues but also little candles in all sorts of styles. He made decor and soap and even some perfume. The cabin smelled clean and fresh and modern. There was something so peaceful about that place.

11 Oct 2024

Dream

I dreamed of being in a spiritual game. I was testing out shooting through hoops of which will give me points and what doesn't. And I figured out the game and how to win points. Then I dreamed after the game that we were to take a break. We were all outside taking a smoking break (I never smoke) and it seems addicting that I was looking forward on the next break to go back to smoke again. In the middle of the next break, I could feel myself being addicted or wanting more and I was shrugging it off like I was okay with it. Then there was a speech to announce about encompressing so there was a swim talent show and I was in a line down the escalator, but I overheard other people with superior talent and I was panicking because I thought it was a swim race, not a talent show. I wasn't sure how to show talent in swimming. Then I woke up

9 Oct 2024

Dream

I was playing outside in the schoolyard of some school. I was kind of alone and there was this other gangster guy who was by himself frustratedly playing with a ball. He was mad bc the adults were punishing him for his bad behavior a lot. I didn’t have a ball to play with and he was kind of hogging the ball so after he threw it to this trash can to make a basket and it bounced off I grabbed it and started playing with it which drew his attention toward me. When the ball that o threw had bounced far off in the field I noticed him notice me isolated and alone as I went to go get it. On the second time the ball bounced far away over a fence into a barranca beyond the field I noticed him follow me out to get the ball. He was looking around making sure nobody saw what he was about to do with a evil violent grin on his face as he came towards me. He took his time seeming to help me look for the ball and I couldn’t figure out how he was going to hurt me so I asked him “you’re going to try to kill me now aren’t you?” And he said “ look at your hands.” He showed me a plant and said “ this plant paralyzes your limbs and neck so you can’t scream and fight and all it takes is a few pokes from the plant” I looked at my hands and they had five or so poke marks in them. I tried to get back to the school but I couldn’t move. I started panicking and the more I panicked and struggled the more I turned into a child, a younger child that wasn’t me and I dissociated and saw myself from above, almost like through the gangster bullies eyes but couldn’t do anything while he was about to murder me. The child me flapped his hands kind of like a bird trying to get move while crying and then I was woken up by someone in real life.

9 Oct 2024

Dream

I needed to get to this location and the only way to get there was by using a small golf cart. The only problem was that the cart was placed inside a concrete shaft which required the person riding the cart to lie down as if in a coffin. The shaft had an equal amount of openings though placed in between all the enclosed parts. I am very claustrophobic, however I decided that since the tunnel had so many openings I could sit up and catch a breather in between the closed parts. I got in the cart placed my hands on my chest and started going however when I reached the opening I realized part of it was covered by a thick ridge on the side of the shaft and there was not enough room for me to get up. Looking ahead I saw they were all similar. I knew that probably not all of them were like that and I could get up in a few places but soon the realization hit me that I was trapped there and there was no way i was going to have any chance of getting up any time soon. I started to panic of course i could feel my heart beating out of my chest, my breaths grew more frantic with every second. I remember thinking that in my life i have experienced panic attacks before but i could sit in a fetal position and hug myself tight and drink water but now i couldn’t even sit up. Using all the adrenaline induced force i could muster i stopped the cart with my legs and started pushing myself back towards the entrance. Finally after painstakingly pushing myself back the way i came now getting back out of the tunnel would be the new problem. It was very tight and i was already shaking alot. First i pushed my torso and then my legs were the most difficult to get out. When i got out i remember there was a crowd of onlookers which included some people in my family like my sister. They booed me for not being brave enough to reach the other end. The tunnels were made of dark grey concrete and mimicked a brutalist style. They looked bleak and cold. A reflection of the dark places in my mind. After being booed, i tried to get back in the tunnel a couple of ways I tried walking forward alongside it and trying to fit in some of the gaps but it was no use. Eventually i gave up and accepted that i was not reaching the other side through this tunnel.

29 Sep 2024

Dream

I was with my family and there was this potion which would kill you after drinking it in 24 hours and I drank it but immediately regretting it and I searched about it online to see if it really works and there were cases where it did work and famous people drank it and then died after 24 hours and I was really panicked and regretted it so much and then after 24 hours nothing happened and I woke up