1 Nov 2023
Dream
i’m at a party at one of my restaurant coworker’s house (his name is jeff), and he so happens to live next door to people i used to go to high school with that treated me terribly. i’m super uncomfortable, and i end up having to dodge them constantly. jeff can sense that something is wrong as i start to leave. he hugs me for a long time, and i can tell he wants to kiss me, but we don’t. then, i’m at a restaurant where my dad works, trying to get him to help me move, and i point to my truck outside, a big truck with a forklift on it and all my belongings in it. he says he will be right there but he gets distracted by a public event that is going on outside. then, my truck gets stolen and I can’t find him anywhere either. i’m also on a tinder date, but this guy gets bombarded by his ex who wants to get back together with him, and they both get swept away in the same crowd my dad did. i’m impatient and disoriented. then i morph into a professor about to give a speech in an auditorium. then, i’m myself again, looking for a seat where my friend Victoria is supposedly waiting for me. i’m texting her, unable to communicate because my phone is acting up, and i’m lost. then a professor (maybe the one i was before this?) comes up to me and wants to help me. he’s hot, and i wonder if he’s hitting on me, and also wonder how i seem to him glued to my phone. oh no, have i become one of those kids? ew. then i finally find victoria, and she looks different, and the friends with her are super hip girls that make me nervous and old. then i’m suddenly the professor again, and i’m trapped in a coil of thorns, like grossly deformed rose petals with huge thorns stuck inside me. someone did this to sabotage me because i was going to be granted an award for my academic theories. i’m looking around for someone to help me, and i go into another professor’s home - he is upset because he knows that i am going to be awarded, and he thinks his career is over. obviously he’s not helping me at all, but instead breaking down, going crazy. i leave, and there is ominous music and i float backwards through a hallway, staring at the door to his house that i just shut. the music feels suspenseful, and i get the feeling that i’ve “seen this movie before,” so i know what’s coming and i’m bracing for it - then, gunshots. he killed himself. in outside and i decide to uncoil myself from the thorns, and it’s painful, and bloody, and grotesque. i’m bleeding so much down my legs, and the thorns are so large almost like teeth. my white slippers become soaked, and i’m worried about blood loss and whether i should have done this. then a mother and her children come to help me as i’m bleeding out and fading in consciousness, and they take me to a hospital where i get an IV put in me to restore me again.