28 Mar 2025
Dream
In the dream, I went back at my aunt Karen's and my Nana's house, but it was the dreamscape version of it not the true version.. there is a true version of places I know in waking life but when I dream I go somewhere else where it’s all consistently the same sans I know my way around and it never changes it's like a secondary land or something that I visit in my sleep and I know it the same way I know my way around the places in waking life but there's always a different version when I sleep I call it the dreamscape.. my nanas in both realities is a place of comfort and happiness and fond childhood memories and I wanted to stay the night but there was nowhere for me to be. I waited for my nana to come home all night long, I stared at her little corner where she would sit in her special chair surrounded by her things, her books, crosswords, police scanner, candies, etc. finally she returned. I was so happy I cried. She was going to lay down in the bedroom like she would do with me and my cousin when we were little- there was 2 twin beds pushed together and she’d lay there telling us stories of mystical creatures and far away lands… only this time They had no room for me and I was just wanted to belong so bad and they were gonna make a a place for me. They said that I could sleep under the kitchen table.. they called it “Mike Tyson’s old room” but there dining room is traditionally always dirty and clu. and I don't know, I it was really dirty cluttered. This was my nana’s house (great grandma passed away 2 weeks before my grandma in 2011 and was her mother, both maternal grandparents ) and I was afraid of spiders and stuff and though I would have taken it just to be part of the family again.
My cousin Kelly (always thought I had good relationship with as a kid but turns out she was always jealous of me because I was my grandmas favorite and we had a family secret or scandal really in waking life, my grandma was raised as aunt Karen’s sister by my nana but was really her biological mother. Because of this Kelly always envied me.) she had a baby and I would play with her baby and watch her baby. and um in the dream they my friend Wesley called me and I and asked me if I wanted to get loaded and he had these like weed they were like fruit rollups, but they were THC ones. and so I don't even think I took them that he took them. But instead of eating them, we put him in our butt, I don't know, it was weird, but anyway, um, so he asked if I wanted to go 4 wheeling, so we go up to these hills that are the hills in Livermore where I’m from but the dreamscape version which are more scenic a bit taller and much steeper and u could see the landscape looked like farm land does from an airplane like patches on a quilt and it looked like someone made a quilt of Midwest farm land and just laid it over steep rolling hills like the manicured fields would be on the sides of these steep hills and I remember thinking how could they cultivate the land like that the hills are too steep it’s like they could walk up the side free of gravity it was so strange.., and he just starts like going like driving the hills all crazy and I was getting scared and he just drives off the edge of this cliff, like, and we just flip, like multiple times, and we and it was just I was so scared, and the boom we land. I was like, oh, my God.
I was so terrified. And then we, uh, keep trying keep driving, and I keep telling them to be careful and there's water, there's like a river, and I keep telling them be careful, and then, boom, he drives right into the into the lake in a a river or something, and I'm like, oh my God, and I'm I told him, I can't swim, I can't swim, I can't swim. And you just didn't even listen, and he just, in the truck started sinking and I was trying to and then all of a sudden I I was panicking, and then the door wasn't open, so I realized I had to be calm an unroll the window, and so I stayed calm and I rolled the window down manually, and I was able to crawl out. and swim to the surface, and it was so mad and and somehow he pulled his truck out of the water. and I like an idiot, I got back inside the truck, and we ended up pulling up to this house and I go, do you know the people here?
And he goes, yeah. And then we get inside, we go to the store. And I was just like a little little Asian kid, like a Chinese kid or something.
He said there, you're just watching cartoons. And I'm like, where's his mom? And then I hear the mom and she's like talking, and get some foreign language, and I'm like, oh, Wesley, you don't know these people. what the hell?
And, um, and so I got scared and like, I started panicking and I I was trying to leave, and there was this big stack of like glass shelves, and I moved over to try to get out and I knocked him over and I just ran and I went for the car and I could just hear the the camera sitting back door open, and I was like, oh my God. And then some girl comes out and she was at Asia, but she had like an I accent and then was she goes, oh, are you are you mad at me? And she was, and and I was like, oh, God, he does know with them.
And then she like, runs up to him and like, starts making out with them and stuff and then he drives to kiss me and I'm like, what the hell? And then he's like, let's go inside. It was just really weird.
