30 Dec 2023
Dream
My family and I were getting ready for dinner. My parents are divorced and my dads side of the family is not usually altogether divorced let alone with my mom being there. They would kind of just pop up as I thought about them and my surroundings were just white clouds/ fog. My mom was cooking one of her soups, but I couldn’t really tell what it was or what we were eating. She kept coming off as aggressive- but I think she was just irritated because my dad was around but I remember making certain comments towards her that made her an I have a bonding moment… I just can’t remember what was said (now that I’m awake)
I go back to the table and I keep seeing Genna (my younger sister) asking my dad a whole bunch of questions about smoking weed, what’s it like, what are the best times for it. Then she is asking how can she bring it to a movie theatre (the weed) and not smell like it so she doesn’t get in trouble. I remember telling her not to carry it around on her since she does not live in a state where it is legal yet, but maybe just smoke it in a private safe space and then cover up the smell and then go out but she wasn’t really listening and from somewhere ominous my mom was chiming in. We got to a point in the conversation where I was trying to say what I wanted to say about my opinion on day smokers versus night smokers and dad said that he would figure people like to smoke more at night. Genna then agrees. Then they change the subject and at this point it’s just me, Genna, and my dad, but they are talking about how everyone eats. They complimented me about something and I remember feeling warm, and good. The frustrations of that silly conversation we had earlier go away. I remember that I kept saying things and thinking as I do now with a conscious and they would look at me like I went off of some sort of script. They weren’t mad just kind of surprised where certain things I would say is coming from. Genna and Dad still were enjoying my company. I realize there’s nothing really in the bowls, and there’s still this white fog and light surrounding us as we eat and talk. I think I get up from the table at this point because then I remember talking to my ex, Jeremy. We always hit it off and talk as if we were still together… but then he’ll say something to remind me we’re not together or I’ll suddenly remember that pain again. It’s like he’s only ever see around in my dreams to get something he needed really quick then to just leave me all over again.