14 May 2024
Dream
Am at what looks like a hybrid of my grandma’s house, the dingy apartment my late mother and younger lived in when I was in Hakone from around the 9th grade or so, and another house I lived in until I was around the 8th(I lived in Tokyo so I’d visit them every now and then)
Am hiding away from my father, my mother offers me a room to stay in until it’s over
The room is identical to my room in the second house we had in Hakone but rarely felt “home” in due to the fact that 1. I couldn’t keep my locks on, 2. Most of the time my father would use it whenever he’d come and visit and 3. Even when he’s away to Tokyo for work my mother would have me sleep with her and my brother in the same room because “they are my family” and “families spend time together” and “I have my own space to be alone in back at Tokyo anyway(I didn’t; I basically slept in the same room as my father there, had no privacy unless I got back from school earlier and he was back from work late, and even that was rare because after COVID he’d have a stay-at-home job)
At where the cloth-hanger was in the Hakone apartment I see a vision of some sort of a saint or a bodhisattva
After that my grandmother(the mother’s side’s) comes in and sorts the clutter in the room out and such
My mother is also in the room, offering prayers to the ancestors by the Buddhist altar
A small artwork done by a child is being hung on the wall right beside the space in the wall, along with a portrait of a bodhisattva statue
Mother says that ever since I was little, monks would remark that I’m being protected by the Acalanatha, and teachers say that I’m blessed by Manjusri themselves
And then a thought about Princess Suseri and Princess Toyotama two of the Shinto deities a guardian deity identification has brought my attention to as potential matrons, comes to mind
I wake up
