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19 May 2024
Dream
I have a lucid dream where I find myself laying naked in the bed where I was raped as a young boy. My body is covered in scars and marks. Hands that look like the hands of my perpatrator pin me down. The bed is surrounded by cameras which look like the camera my rapist used to film himself raping me. Strange men who I do not know, but who may have viewed the recordings also surround the bed. At the end of the bed stands my rapist, he is also naked. It looks like the direct aftermath of the rape. Both of us are covered in sweat. There is blood on the bed and sheets. The hands pinning me down lossen. I sit up right and ask him why he did that to me. He looks down. I ask him again, he replies that he "doesn't know". The hands loosen even more and I sit upright even more. I ask him a third time and he says "I loved you and I wanted you to stay young forever". I raise my voice and tell him that I was 11 and that he was in his 40s he replies by saying "I am sorry I really am". He leans forward and places his hands on my body, healing the scars and marks. Then he walks off into the distance.
I was at a school party it was like a lockdown of some sort and it was Halloween i was wandering the halls looking at the different Halloween decorations and going up each floor of the school until I came across my old childhood friend she seemed way too excited and happy about something her face was fuzzy but I could see that she was smiling big I felt really off about this incounter right off the bat and she said come with me I want to show u something so cool so I fallowed her up more stares and down more halls until we came across a door she looked at me again with that wide smile and we walked it he old friend who she hung out with more than me in school was there and she also looked suspiciously excited and happy there was a mirror next to my old friends friend and it was one of those wavy distorted carnival mirrors the guided me towards it and I stood in front of it I donโt remember seeing my reflection in the mirror they handed me a big syringe I was comically huge it had this thick dark blue shining liquid in it they I looked at them confused and they said go on u know wat to do and I looked at the mirror with anxiety and took a breath and plunged the syringe deep into my heart and forced the liquid into my chest it created a bulge in my chest so I pushed it down then I woke up screening with my heart racing
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I was in a car with some of my friends and I was giving my chunky friend advice on how to sit in the back seat comfortably we drove to I think a party with some of my work friends we got to the party and everyone ate good food but one person my work crush and I asked if he was hungery and he was like ya but I donโt have money and so I took him to get some food I also remember trying to put a peircing into my gums by myself and it kept falling out
Found a pile of sticks that turned out to be a snake curled up. But the snake did not leave its petrified form. It stayed frozen. Even when I picked it up.
My husband gets a call from a family member of his ex saying she needed to be picked up from jail. I come with him because I donโt trust her motives. Along the way we get in a different car, which I assume is her car. One of her female family members is waiting in the car. She gets out of the front passenger seats and sits behind my husband. My husband is driving and Iโm next to him. As weโre waiting a male family member of hers hands me a letter and sits in the back middle seat. I open it and I find out things about my husbands past that I never knew before. He had a different middle name. His life with his ex was deplorable. His children were barely fed or clothed, and they couldnโt afford anything. As Iโm reading through all the documents his ex gets in back seat behind me clearly upset that Iโm present, and in the front seat of her car while sheโs in the back. As weโre driving I noticed her facial expression is full of hatred towards me but I ignore it and get comfortable by reclining my seat and propping my arm up on the seat. She grabs my hands and tells me how much she hates me and that she should break my thumb. Her male and female family members tells her to stop but she continues on. I calmly look at her hand and proceed to remove her hand from mine. As Iโm preparing to fight her I wake up.
At a party and got into a fight with a past friend .
Cutting flowers with my sister
I dream of having a big real sword and I have to cut a dog . I opened my rooms balcony door took the sword and cut the big brown scary dog neck very easily. I slaughter it . Lil bit more left skin in his neck I cut his neck again I was thinking of cutting the dog in pieces and put the dog body in balcony near plants and tried to hide it . I did my best infront of my family members that I'm not hiding anything. When they get to know about the dog I said that I did it because a Hindu monkey God told me
My ex broke into my house and raped me and continued to beat me
I saw me and my friends were running and hiding from someone. We went to rooftop and started hiding from a woman from neighbour she was looking at us . A guy took my hand and took me to sky and space he showed me stars and galaxy and he even showed me stars constellation like he was controlling them . When I went for closure look to the stars the constellation looks so real and beautiful
there was a subway and I missed I a few times, some famous blonde woman was late to the train well, I think Shakira, when I got on the subway I talked to some familiar faces then I had to go to some arts and crafts lesson I missed out a lot on, I had to buy tools for it at a nearby store, where I met the other students from that class that were joking on how many lessons I missed.
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