14 Aug 2023
Dream
At some point in my dream I remember being in some sort of huge odd store, sitting near a group of people who were friends with one another. I, sitting near but not too close to this long crowded table just look around aimlessly in confusion and trying not to make anyone of which I don't know personally uncomfortable in any way. Every now then my wandering eyes notice another person sitting in between everyone on the opposite side of the table of which I was positioned; staring at me almost intriguingly, observing what seemed like even my every detail in behavior or something. I on instinct get very nervous and awkward and immediately redirect my gaze elsewhere trying to think nothing of it, only for this to happen a couple more times. Soon after a different person from the same side of the table as I but positioned farther off, gets up and walks towards me giving me their full attention with a genuinely bright and warm smile. I redirect my attention in reciprocation and turn my body and gaze towards this person as they get closer and they start making many gestures with their hands, never speaking once during any interaction yet displaying such energetic and friendly energy. I try my best to understand and communicate anything lost in translation. Nearly less than a minute of this and I finally figure out that they are telling me to turn my chair facing towards a wall I originally had my back against before; I swiftly do as instructed, confused. I notice as I do this the person from before upon me being approached by someone else, also moved their chair still opposite of me but only a little farther the other side of me still keeping eye contact. Immediately after I am turned sitting, facing towards the wall the person who gestured me to do so returns to their seat and the previous person from before stands behind me with both hands to the wall over my head almost trapping me. This instantly caught me off guard especially with their chest against my back, (I am not very fond of much physical touch or affection and get flustered and awkwardly tense easily... I do on many specific extents tolerate specific amounts of this or just genuinely don't mind too much in some cases with some people even in just as a compromise; as to most people, such things are very natural, normal, comfortable and or comforting, so I do try my best to find a way to meet in between and create a middle ground). I instantly feel flustered, embarrassed, confused, nervous, and awkward. As I don't know how to react, I awkwardly laugh hoping no one could see my face. The next moment is almost the perspective of watching what happens after this, through the eyes of this person; they start to run their fingers through the top of my hair calmly. As, this is one of my many insecurities I quickly try to explain that my hair is overly greasy, oily, damaged, disgusting even naturally with possible skin and scalp conditions in hopes they'd be discouraged from doing so, and maybe not think as less of me and my unfortunate hair struggles. Although I'm pretty sure my tone of voice whilst saying these things made it obvious of just how much I am self conscious of this especially when many others also expressed this😕. Yet even so they remained somewhat calm yet sounding and seeming slightly defensive tone while expressing their response (I genuinely couldn't hear their words clearly for whatever reason but would feel bad asking for them to reiterate). It sounded as if they say something along the lines of not minding any of this or that no one else would know (of what specifically, I still don't know) and showed this by lightly touching and hanging their hair above mine. In a blink of an eye they are lightly resting against me, hands to the wall again, and their body draped over mine (similarly to before). I turn and see the table, of which some people turn their attention towards us, the person who made the gestures before notices as well and makes an amused grin. I'm still not sure what to make of this and or why of all things to happen, it is this?
