8 Sep 2025
Dream
There was some program involving a cash reward if two people from the same family got pregnant at the same time. Since my sister Ruby was pregnant, my other sister Marley and I looked into getting pregnant just for this program. Marley has a (female) partner so she was in a better position than I was and further along in the process. This program involved a visit from an interviewer who focused on Marley and emphasized that the program was for folks in families that happen to be pregnant at the same time, it wasn’t meant to make people GET pregnant at the same time. Marley laughed resignedly and instantly admitted that she was doing just that and the interviewer chuckled and move on as if it didn’t happen. I was not interviewed and also didn’t have means to get pregnant. I wasn’t sure I wanted to but I was sort of half-involved in this part of the dream in case I could.
This program also involved a long line and waiting area full of people filling out forms. We all sat on a rooftop and the chairs snaked around to maximize space. Marley was near me. I saw Simon way at the end of the line and he didn’t notice me. He didn’t want to be there but filled out his form. I wondered if he was there because he was fathering my child but that made no sense and I felt little emotion seeing him there. He and a few other Germans used kissing sounds to indicate yes, so sometimes I’d hear that noise as they filled out forms and said “yes” to themselves. There was a blonde woman further up in line wearing glasses who was doing this, and probably a few others. I explained the kiss sound to Marley and Ruby, and there was some comment about how it can be pretentious to blend languages, and Marley said queer folks sometimes appropriate Spanish, like just toss Spanish words in their normal English sentence when they themselves aren’t Hispanic. Ruby and I shook our heads at how annoying and pretentious we found that. (None of this is real regarding language/culture so this must be symbolizing something else).
In another part of the dream I went to my high school friend Gwen’s house. In real life our friendship had ended during high school because she was using dating apps while underage and speaking to at least one adult man, and I told the school, who told her parents and they took major disciplinary action against her. Gwen knew I had done it and was mad at me, and we never repaired the friendship after that. I was at Gwen’s house now, so like a decade later, and her parents had a separate mailing address posted by the front door, as well as contact info for hotels they tend to stay at, and contact info for a Colorado Springs place that may have had to do with Gwen herself, and nobody was home at the time. I saw the house was dark inside, particularly an office with a large Apple monitor through the big windows. I wanted to take a pic of the parents’ mailing address so I could use that to write Gwen a long letter (they could forward it to her), and basically wonder what really happened all those years ago and if we could repair things now. I imagined writing this letter and took a pic of the address as an unknown friendly man showed up. He was a habit heavier white guy with swishy brown and grey hair, he looked like a tech nerd. I felt neutral towards him and kind of wanted him to go away, but then he insisted on showing me around. As I got back in my car he somehow got in the driver’s seat and I realized something was bad. I wasn’t scared and immediately strategized as to how to get back in my drivers seat. He was still talkative and I asked to show him some cool art down an alleyway downtown. He resisted but I pretended to be super excited to show him. It was a ploy to get him out of the car, and I just trusted that art would be in this alley as I hadn’t actually been there before. I got him to stop and step out to look at a big yellow mural of potted green succulents and cacti. I don’t remember how this ended or if I got back into the driver’s seat.
Last bit of the dream I was watching a string quartet perform and it gave me great pleasure and nostalgia, though I worried a little that it was boring Marley nearby though she didn’t make a problem of that. The cellist was pregnant and had a prominent yet simple part, very expressive and easy playing. She seemed to lead the music emotionally. There were a few stunning chord changes that made me freeze. I paid attention to each player and their subtle dynamic choices and how easy and carefree they were making this lush music together. Ruby appeared and was doing things above me while I was seated, her pregnant belly very prominent, and I lifted her dress to hug her belly directly, which was covered in fabric for some reason, which she loved and said “aww” to.
Read this dream 
