Dream About Fighting Death And Family

Very vivid all night, one I kept trying to wake up from but slipping right back into it. Bit foggy now, but it started at a big compound like house with my family, close to another group who seemed to be on the run, carrying all their belongings everywhere they went. I ended up trusting them and trying to help. All at a doctors office, got important information that I was trying to retain for them. Every time I tried to write down this word or code, the pen didn’t work or the paper was filled already or plastics so my pen didn’t write on it. Kept repeating it in my head so I could write it down. I was never able to. Then somehow that family was gone and I was on my own. Found myself in situation after situation that was terrifying, such as falling a long distance or trying to hold on to something while in really fast motion. These times, I’d try to wake myself, told myself it was a dream, occasionally would open my eyes and see my husband or dog lying next to me and felt relief, only to fall back into the dream and be terrified by another thing. At some point I realized I was fighting death, like maybe I was in a hospital bed and was fighting to come back to life. Or I had suffered an accident and was dying at the scene. Didn’t see a hospital scenario. I finally asked my husband if I was dead and he just looked at me with tears in his eyes. I was lying flat on a platform that was on a track in the sky, flying through the air, trying so hard to stay on it. Considered letting go, but then the falling and terror would begin again so I tried to hold on and wake up. Then I appeared in a room where my kids dad was. He was surprised and happy to see me, gave me a hug and then my son appeared and did the same thing. I wanted to see my husband, not them. Next person I see is my 2nd ex husband, very disappointed to see him, dismissed him and wondered where my husband and daughter were. I thought if I’m dead and I’m seeing Kevin and Jonah and Jay, are they all dead too? No..if so, I was glad my daughter and husband weren’t there but where was my mom? She passed last August. Then I see my husband and asked him, crying if I was dead and he cried and said yes. I don’t want to be dead, I wanted to stay with him, this was too soon. We just bought our dream home, we’d only had a few years together, I’m too young. Started asking what I could do to stay, what can I change about my life. But it was too late. Finally woke up for good and told my husband that I dreamed that I was dead.