Candy, your dream about visiting your friend and observing her parenting choices is rich with insights about your own perceptions and feelings regarding parenting and relationships. The initial shock you felt at your friend's parenting style may reflect an underlying concern about how others manage responsibilities, particularly in the delicate realm of raising children. This could symbolize your own values and standards when it comes to nurturing, possibly stemming from your experiences and reflections as a widow, where the dynamics of care and support may have shifted significantly in your life.
In dreaming of her two young children, you might be tapping into a deeper desire or contemplation regarding family and connection. Children often represent innocence, potential, and the future, suggesting that you may be reflecting on your own relationship with these concepts. The juxtaposition of being in a friend's home, a place often associated with warmth and acceptance, against your shock at her perceived lack of parenting skills could signify a conflict between your expectations of familial bonds and the reality of how those relationships are expressed in different households.
Moreover, the emotional reaction you experienced—shock—may indicate a deeper reflection on what it means to provide care and love, especially after your own significant loss. Perhaps this dream is prompting you to evaluate your own feelings about parenting, nurturing, or perhaps even your role in the lives of others.