Cindy, your dream about being very fat and feeling disgusted with yourself speaks volumes about your subconscious thoughts and feelings. This dream likely taps into deep-seated insecurities or anxieties about self-image and self-worth. The imagery of being overweight can symbolize a burden or excess in your life—something that feels overwhelming and out of control. Your reaction in the dream, refusing to eat and obsessively exercising, suggests a desperate need to regain control and an intense fear of inadequacy or failure.
By refusing to eat and continuing to exercise relentlessly, you are engaging in behaviors that can be viewed as extreme measures to achieve an ideal or to rid yourself of perceived imperfections. This part of your dream may reflect a real-life tendency toward perfectionism or a fear of not measuring up to certain standards, whether they are imposed by society, your environment, or even self-imposed. It suggests an internal struggle with finding a balance between self-acceptance and self-improvement.
Furthermore, the disgust you feel towards yourself in the dream could signify a conflict between your current self-perception and your desired self-image. This may indicate that you are grappling with feelings of inadequacy or guilt in some aspect of your life, not necessarily confined to physical appearance. It could also point towards emotional or psychological weight that you are carrying, which you feel the need to shed.